The Compound Effect is a book written by New York Times Best Selling author, Darren Hardy. Hardy is the former editor at Success Magazine and is an expert and understanding peak business performance.
In this episode, you’ll learn:
- How and why you should be the world’s biggest believer in consistency
- Why you should claim 100% ownership of everything that happens to you
- 5 step checklist to get momentum behind compounding success
- Why success is something you attract by the person you become
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PODCAST TRANSCRIPT AND SUMMARY (Automated)
Preston: [00:01:04] All right. How’s everyone doing out there? So like we said in the introduction, we’re going to be covering the book The Compound Effect. And this was written by Darren Hardy. I personally really liked this book. In fact, I might go as far as saying that this would be like a top 10 or top 15 books for me and I’m curious, Stig if you had the same opinion on this? Did you like this as much as I liked it or did you think it was average? I’m curious to hear your thoughts.
: [00:01:29] Well I liked the book in terms of the universal rules that he outlines. It’s so clear that he’s grading what’s available speaker. And so whenever you explain something it’s never like this is how you get wealthier is always like it’s not 10 time at a hundred times a thousand times richer than before. And so I guess like if you like that no it Colaba as a luck more Scott than I want to. I think you need to know that before you are potential read the book. But as I said before like other principles that he outlines for having successful life I think that’s pure gold. And his mindset is just such an abundance of good advice and a good way of living your life. So I definitely agree with you on that one.
: [00:02:15] What I also liked about it is he’s saying how can you achieve success and you know use this compounding effect in order to achieve success. But he doesn’t say what success is he leaves that up to the person who’s reading it to define what it is that they’re trying to achieve. So like you know I think a lot of people immediately turn to think that it means financial success but that doesn’t necessarily mean what he’s getting at here. A person who would read this and this is going to help them achieve whatever it is that they’re going after whatever that goal might be. I’d also say this would be one of those books that I think would be really important for a person to read multiple times. I think that this would be something that you know you should probably pull out every six months or every year and probably read this and it’s not a long book. This is like 150 pages 160 pages. But it’s just straight to the point it tells you what you need to focus on in order to keep going away and achieve what you want. So we’re going to do for the book is we’re going to go chapter by chapter and just kind of give you the highlights of what we read here.
: [00:03:11] So the very first chapter defines what the compound effect in action is. And it starts off the book by stating this he says. Ever heard the story of the tortoise and the hare. He says ladies and gentlemen I am the tortoise give me enough time and I will beat virtually anybody any time in any competition. And he says why not because I’m the best or the smartest or the fastest I’ll win because of positive habits I’ve developed and because of the consistency I use in applying those habits I am the world’s biggest believer in consistency. That’s how he starts the book. And having read a lot of different books on you know these billionaires that we study in these success habits and stuff I can honestly say this is one of the critical variables. This is one of the things Heap’s Komanoff over and over again is developing good habits and then doing them consistently over and over and optimizing those habits and that’s how he starts off the book and he says in short the compound effect is the principle of reaping huge rewards from a series of small almost minuscule Smart Choices day in and day out. And that’s what this book is about.
: [00:04:29] And he provides this great example with these three friends Scott and Brad and this example just had very similar Siris stakes. So let’s assume that Larry keeps doing what he has always done. Scott makes those small positive changes that pressed him talked about before say he’d be reading 10 pages in a book about self development he’ll be calling 125 calories per day by simply replacing soda with Baldor and then you’ll also be walking an extra 1000 steps and then you have Brad and he’s opposite of Scott.
: [00:05:06] Here he makes a few more choices like you’ll be buying a new screen TV eating more to shirt just say adding one drink more per week or going to a new bar. You know not anything big just small consistent changes in his habit. And he also did the math for us. He said after a month 10 there is no perceivable difference by months 20. There are some differences but by month thirty one differences become quickly quite stock Scott the guy with good habits he loses thirty three point five pounds. He gets a promotion and the race and his marriage is thriving and then Braben the other hand with bad habits he puts on. There are three fine. Five pounds is thirty seven pounds more than Scott and he he starts feeling slokas less confident about himself probably also becoming less productive work. More withdrawn from his marriage and basically brings both unhappiness both at work and at home. I really like this example in the book he actually provides that detail math of how he came up with this but I think it tells you something about the consistency of having the habits and also because whenever we are thinking about changing life we think about big changes. You know a divorce or winning a lottery or something like that. But that’s not you will live your life is all you have. All the small changes you do on a daily basis either to your advantage or disadvantage. And this bogey is all about using those universal rules to your advantage.
: [00:06:46] One of the things that I liked in this kind of piggybacks on the Charles Duhigg theme of keystone habits is that this compounding impact this ripple effect that if you change one thing that it’ll ripple off into other areas of your life and that’s kind of what stick was describing there with the story but I know and Charles Duhigg book he talked about how if a person tries to become healthier all that actually rippled into all these other areas and they had all these other better habits because of that one habit. He doesn’t describe it that way in the book but he kind of hints at that by this section that he calls ripple effects of of your habits. So that’s how he defines this compounding effect is that it’s these small little things that you do day in and day out that are just slightly tweaking your habits and that in the long run it produces these massive rewards in interest if you will on the behavior. So in chapter two this chapter is titled choices and what he says is every decision no matter how slight alters the trajectory of your life whether or not you go to college whom to marry have the last drink before you drive to indulge in gossip or stay silent to make one more perspective call or to call it a day or to say I love you or not. Every choice has an impact in your life and the result of all those choices is what you have today. And so what I really like about this idea is he also gets at the fact that I’m sure people have heard this before that not making any choice is a choice as well. So if you decide to do nothing and just sit on your hands that in fact is a choice and that’s going to also drive what path you’re going down.
: [00:08:32] So after stating that he says your biggest challenge isn’t that you’ve initially been making bad choices he says Heck that would be really easy to fix. Your biggest challenge is that you’ve been sleepwalking through your choices and he says that a majority of the choices that people make they have no idea they’re making them on a daily basis.
: [00:08:56] They’re just habits that they’re just almost like a programmed response and I think there was this art in here where he quoted some Harvard and I don’t know if it was in the second chapter but he quotes a Harvard Ph.D. that some analysis and it was something like 95 percent the choices that a person makes throughout the day are just completely habit based or doing them just out of total habit like you’re driving to work. You’re just making decisions you’re making choices that are completely subconscious. For the most part you’re just putting on your turn signal you opened the refrigerator at this time when you walk down the steps like all of these things are just naturally happening because they’re habits and that’s where he’s saying you have to figure out what those things are and start taking control of those habits.
: [00:09:42] And I absolutely love this. Whenever he says that the day you graduate from childhood to adulthood is when you take 100 percent responsibility I think that’s just such an important thing and he even starts out this chapter by saying if there’s just one thing just one thing you can take away from this book should be. It’s your responsibility in that sense. And I absolutely love that. You know he comes up with great Sambos saying if you’re late from work don’t blame the traffic. It’s yours sponsor village just leave earlier if there’s a lot of traffic if your co-worker messed up your presentations that you’re all well you could have double checked on your successes and failures always point the fingers to watch yourself because otherwise you come into this mindset of being a victim which is something he talks a lot about and this book never ever victim. It’s not about luck. Right. I mean because that would be the next thing. Well some people are lucky and debunks that by saying well 80 percent of us millionaires their first generation. So yeah you can make an argument that the other 20 percent you know oh lucky. Sure. But the vast majority they made by themselves they made it because they are personally responsible for what you’re doing. And he says you know yeah you can get lucky but that’s more in terms of health issues or where you were born. And he has this form in his book. When he says this the Falmer full lock. If anything his preparation was just the personal growth plus attitude which is your believe in mindset plus of a humanity that the good things are coming your way. If you see it plus action meaning doing something about it that’s luck nothing more and nothing less and I like how he lists Safka as always easy to say yeah just an hour person. No I wasn’t born with a million dollars. So what. It’s still your responsibility 100 percent.
: [00:11:38] You know whenever I was younger at my high school days I was really really bad at taking 100 percent ownership for anything that happened. It was just I guess for me very easy to say oh well you know that happened over there because of this other person or yeah it was maybe a little bit of my fault but it was always like partially my responsibility was never 100 percent my responsibility. And one of the most difficult things that I learned whenever I showed up at West Point the very first day was this idea of a 100 percent ownership because let me tell you that was the thing that probably stood out more than anything that I learned those first couple of days the first year the whole four years was this idea that no matter what happened to me personally whether it was good or whether it was bad it was 100 percent my fault or my responsibility. And you know it was weird because we would do these things called duties is what they were called. Your very first year that you do these things called duties. And one of the duties that you have to do each week was all the laundry for the whole school was done like we’d have to send out this laundry in like these bags and then the laundry would come back and then the freshman we’d have to sort the laundry we’d have to prioritize it by the rank of all the students in our company which was about 120 people in our company.
: [00:13:08] We’d have to prioritize this laundry and then we’d have to deliver it to all the upperclassmen in the highest rank to the lowest rank and that somebody couldn’t go out the door and we were all stuffed in this room. We couldn’t be like out in the hallway or anything we were stuffed in one person’s room so their room would just get destroyed with all this laundry in there and then we had to deliver it to each person and you couldn’t deliver it out of order so if I tried to take it to somebody who was you know 50 ranks lower than the number one guy in the company we had to wait in the room with his laundry until that guy came back in. So long story short we’d make tons of mistakes and we’d make all these errors and you’d get stopped by these upperclassmen as you’re like delivery and be like why did this happen.
: [00:13:51] And you like you know darn well it has. It was like maybe your buddy did something or he messed it up and he handed it to you wrong but if you even thought about responding that it was somebody else’s fault you were just done. You were just dead. They were going to destroy you.
: [00:14:08] And I mean this is one example of like many that happened on a daily basis where you’d be asked the question about why you did or didn’t do something and it might be 100 percent somebody else’s fault but you had to always say sir there’s no excuse. I failed to do whatever it was and then that was the reason why you were late. That was the reason why you failed to accomplish something and always came back to why you failed to do something or why you might have done something right.
: [00:14:39] And so this experience for me totally manipulated the way I thought before I went there and I never really understood how powerful that lesson was until years after I graduated. Because later on you know five 10 years later and I’m looking back I was having a conversation with my kids one time and I was saying well you just have to take 100 percent responsibility for anything that happens in your life. And they they looked at me like I was nuts like well what if somebody comes up and punches you in the back of the head like how do you take responsibility for that.
: [00:15:14] And I was just like I don’t know I just do like I shouldn’t have been walking on that street and they just looked at me like I was nuts. But you know and a person listening to this they might think that’s nuts like that doesn’t make any sense whatsoever.
: [00:15:25] But I think what Erin hearties getting in the book with this idea is that people who take 100 percent responsibility for every single thing that happens to them they’re always looking to improve because the thing that they’re asking themselves like let’s just take the extreme example somebody comes up and hit you and you don’t even know this person like the person who takes 100 percent responsibility would be asking themselves What could I have done different so that wouldn’t have happened to me. And at the end of that question they might come to the responsively. Really there was nothing I could have done. But by starting with I’m 100 percent responsible for everything that happens with me. You go through that process of trying to optimize or figure out how you could have done something better. And when you don’t start with that mindset you’ll never think that way and you’ll never try to optimize because it always be like. Well you know I wasn’t responsible for any of this it was all that other person and you never go through that process of trying to optimize yourself. And so I don’t know. I’m a very very firm believer of this owning 100 percent of everything for yourself because it forces you to stop playing the victim card because there isn’t a victim card in the pocket anymore. When you start thinking like this but I think it’s a strong leap for a lot of people to do say that your boss is mean to you and you’re like just because he’s messed up my fault perhaps you’re right.
: [00:16:49] But if that’s the situation it’s your responsibility to do it on the job. Or is your responsibility to be transferred to another department or whatever that might be is always your responsibility. Because otherwise you would just fall into this role of being a victim.
: [00:17:04] I want to say this too. I think it’s important for people to recognize that everyone starts out life at a different starting point. There are some people that start life in a very easy upbringing. They have fantastic parents that have groomed them and train them to think in a certain way and they go on to do really successful things and then there’s people that grow up in the worst possible circumstances you could ever imagine. I mean I’ve seen this firsthand with my own eyes and some of the places I’ve lived in combat zones and things. And let me tell you it’s almost mind boggling to think about the differences of where people start their lives but I think this is what’s really important. I’m not saying one is right and one is wrong or anything in-between. But I think what people need to understand is I look at it like this. Some people when they start their life they have to climb a hill that is much steeper and other people don’t. It’s just completely flat. And for those people that are climbing the very steep hill you can look at it from this perspective you’re being groomed to handle some of the most difficult situations possible so if you can work your way out of that once you do start getting some momentum and moving forward it’s going to make the comparison to the person who had the flat surface from the start that much easier once you do break through. But I think one of the key things to breakthrough even though that you had a disadvantage from the start. You can get to that same level it’s going to be harder.
: [00:18:35] It’s absolutely going to be harder but you can’t get to that same level and when you do get to that same level you’re going to blow past them at such a clip and such a speed that it’s going to make them look like they’re standing still. So you could almost say that it can be an asset. But it’s very hard to overcome and it’s very hard to get the momentum going from the start. And that’s what’s really difficult. But I think that this mindset 100 percent ownership is such a vital piece to success.
: [00:19:04] Whatever you define success as Yeah and I think that’s a good transition to chapter 3 which is called habits and Preston was already hinting at momentum which is the fourth chapter. Now you get that whether or not you had a handicap from day one.
: [00:19:19] So Chapter 3 starts off with a story that I just absolutely love it says a wise teacher was taking a stroll through the forest with a young pupil and stopped before a tiny little tree. A little sapling and he looked at the pupil and he said pull up that sapling there pull it right out of the ground. And so the pupil went up and just pulled the sapling right out of the ground where wheezy and so the wise teacher walked over to. Now like a little bit more of an established sapling. It was a little bit taller maybe like up to his knees or his waist. He says pull that small tree out of the ground so the pupil goes and he just pulls it straight out without much of a fuss. He goes over to yet another tree and this one’s like up to his shoulder and he says pull this one out of the ground and he grabs a hold of it and he’s kind of Yank in and twisting and doing like the thing that you always got to do when you’ve got a poor tree out of the ground and it’s a little bit difficult and then all of a sudden the roots kind of snap and you pull it down and you fall on your butt. And so the wise teacher says Alright come on over here and he stands in front of this massive oak that he’s looking up and it’s just like reaching towards the sky. And he says pull that out of the ground. And of course the pupil just kind of smiles and starts laughing.
: [00:20:30] And his point is this he says some of your habits it’s so big with the roots so deep you might hesitate to even try pulling it out of the ground.
: [00:20:42] And whenever I think about people that are in their 50s 60s 70 years old and you try to teach them or maybe have them form a different habit than what they’re used to doing that’s almost like an impossible task it’s like trying to pull an oak out of the ground and I think anybody hearing that story can quickly realize that if you’re in your 20s 30s 40s maybe your 50s if you’re not trying to change a habit that you know is a bad habit that’s causing pain in your life. Man you got to get to work on that thing fast because it might get to the point where you just start laughing and saying Yeah that’s not changing. So the thing here is that changing your habits regardless of what age you are can be extremely difficult and very very difficult if you’re older. Just for the same reasons we’ve talked about and so he says that the solution to changing a habit needs to start with the Y. And I’m going to pass it over to stick to explain what the Y is all about.
: [00:21:46] So I guess for me Chapter 3 was probably the best chapter because it’s about habits and for people listening to the podcast and no hobby billionaires 2 are on habits and forming the right habits so for me that was kind of like child Stu Hayek’s book compact version of that in Chapter 3. The best pint and he has it’s about the power and just to explain what the power is is that to achieve something you need to have a reason to do so. Why should I do this. Like why should I get from my couch. There should be a good reason you should do so. Oh why she simply won’t do it. And he comes up with this example when we’re something like very dangerous jumping off a cliff or going into burning a house or something like that. And he said I would never do that or when bucks. Why would I do that. Super super dangerous butts you said. Of course I would do it to save my cat. I wouldn’t have to attend the moment. I know it would be extremely dangerous but by wide power of going into that burning house it’s just so much stronger. And I think that’s such an important concept for everyone who sets a goal because you can always set a goal of losing 50 pounds or become a millionaire in 5 yes you know yeah that’s great. Are you wide powers and good enough so what can you do if you lose those 50 pounds. Can you play around with your kids is that you’ll wipe our or if you’ve got that million bucks. Like who do your job and start your dream bestest of whatever this because before you have that is just not going to happen then.
: [00:23:27] I can see that myself in one of the Jopson had really like my job really like my boss. And yeah I want to stop my own company. Some part time. But why now. It was a dream but I really didn’t have a good Y reason to do so and there was a rotation and I got a new boss except the same department and everything just became Shuma toxic for me. Of course I didn’t blame myself it was always my boss’s fault them not me. I didn’t take personal responsibility at all even though I should. But the point in terms of this chapter is now a hat and willpower. Now I came home just a slate and before when they were I was happy about my work. You know I would just be hanging out my friends or watching TV or whatever. But now that it was please my job even though I came home at the same time had the same energy level I still forced myself to figure out how can I stop my own business and it’s just because of that simple fact. I had a reason to do so because that is what’s happening when you have this why power. This is where your attention goes. And with that your energy and time. It’s kind of like giving yourself a new set of eyes and then those sounds very spiritual. But I think anyone who has really had a reason to do something very badly suddenly see how the Stoss sometimes align.
: [00:24:49] So after hearing Stig talk about the wise I think what we’re really getting at here which is I think maybe even a deeper level than the why is like what is your fundamental goals like you’re on a boat and you’re steering this boat somewhere. Like what is the destination. And I think for a lot of people out there they’re just kind of like the sail isn’t even set and they’re just kind of flapping around in the wind just blowing them all over the place and they’re not really steering the boat anywhere. They’re just kind of along for the ride and wherever the wind blows them is where they’re going. And I think what a lot of people need to ask themselves. You got to start with where my going. Like what’s the destination like. What’s the big destination. Like what is it that I’m trying to solve here. What’s my end state. And if you can’t define that very clearly then you’re just kind of flapping around in the wind out there. And so like I would charge people like you know you’re probably listening to this in your car or whatever but when you get back a lot of piece of paper and write down the five things like where you’re going. Like what is it that you’re trying to accomplish in life. What is it that you’re trying to do. Because whenever you know that all the other wise will fall into place and they can be subbed nested underneath of those big overarching goals that you’re trying to achieve. And I think that that is just so important for people to do. And I would argue I would have no idea what percent of people literally have no idea what their goals are there and states or what it is trying to achieve.
: [00:26:26] I think they’re just they’re just going day by day and whatever comes their way they just kind of take it all right so Chapter 4 is titled momentum and he refers to momentum as Big Mo he keeps saying Big Mo in the book. But in general he talks about this idea that whenever you start doing things consistently and you set up goals and you’re saying I’m going to achieve this and I’m going to do this for 30 minutes every day at this time I’m going to do X Y and Z and you kind of get in this rhythm what you do is you start building momentum behind that thing that you’re working towards. And he has a picture in the book of a kid on a playground with like those Mariga around so you can kind of start spinning. And you know how like they’re kind of hard to get going. But then once they start spinning they get going faster and then after you get that thing moving so fast like it’s kind of easy to keep it going. The speed that it’s gone. He says that’s what it’s like when you set a goal whenever you do these small things every single day built through habit loops that you’re consistently doing it over and over and over again and what you do is you build up this momentum and then once that momentum is moving like it’s really hard to stop you. And so in the book he says a couch potato has the momentum to continue to be a couch potato but a person who who has this success rhythm continues busting their butt and ends up achieving more and more and more and they just keep achieving at a faster clip because they’ve got these success loops and these success habits in place. And so you have to figure out what is it that I can design around my lifestyle that I can start building these success loops and success habits to gain this momentum.
: [00:28:18] Because once that momentum gets going it’s really hard stop. But at the same time it’s very hard to get it going. And he uses a water pump if you’ve ever used the water pump like it takes forever if you just keep pumping and pumping it first like no water’s coming up and it just feels like your arm is going to fall off and then all of a sudden the water starts coming out.
: [00:28:39] And if you stop pumping it goes the whole way back down and you got to do it all over again. But if you just keep gradually pumping it once the water starts coming out you can just keep that momentum going and he says that’s exactly what success is like. Once you start achieving it you have to keep doing it you have to stand that rhythm.
: [00:28:55] He has this beautiful example of the rocket ship that uses more fuel. The first minutes then the rest of the journey because it has to break free from the pull of gravity and that is especially true if you are born under unlucky circumstances. You called it that but then what happens is that once you’re pulled free of gravity can glide into orbit because you have momentum. And that’s also why it’s so important not to break the consistency say that you want to lose weight and then you just slip one day and you eat ten burgers. Now it’s not the damage of the 10 Burgis that’s the problem. It’s the momentum that you lost. That’s the problem is it takes so long to build.
: [00:29:40] So I got a really cool story to tell. So whenever I was a cadet back in the day I think it was between my junior and senior year. I had the opportunity to do an internship at NASA and I worked in the Astronaut Office at NASA. And this was with my degree I didn’t aerospace engineering degree and so they gave me this awesome opportunity to go down there and work in the national office. Well when I was down there I had a couple of astronauts that asked me if I’d like to go on a flight with them in their simulator.
: [00:30:13] And I was like Well yes. Like who the heck wouldn’t want to do that. So this was the coolest experience ever. So we go into this simulator. This is at Johnson Space Center in Houston and they take me into this room. It was a large room with like this simulator on like hydraulics and the simulator starts when you climb in you kind of lay down on your back because I don’t know if people think about this but when the shuttle launches this is before Space X and all that kind of stuff. This was decades ago but the space shuttle is upright and so the crew is literally sitting on their backs when everything starts off. So like in the simulator there I am sitting next to there was I think there was three or four astronauts sitting beside me. And then you had the captain and the co-pilot there in front so I could see them in front of me and then I had a bunch of astronauts sitting right next to me in the back seats. And this is how it is in the real space shuttle. So in the simulator it starts shaking and it goes through like this simulator and there’s like a small window right to my left that I could look out and I could see everything there. You know it wasn’t the best graphics but it was the graphics were decent. And so the spaceship starts shaking and I can see. And they showed me this before we started.
: [00:31:28] They said There’s your speed and it’s going to be in Mach like the speed of sound. It’s going to click off by the speed of sound of how fast you’re going. And so we took off and I mean it was probably a minute or two minutes into the sequence and it’s hard for me to remember the exact measurements here but I want to say it like two minutes or two minutes and 30 seconds we had left from Florida and we were like halfway across the Atlantic Ocean and like two and a half minutes or something like that it was totally nuts.
: [00:31:59] And so as the ship kept going in the simulator. Mind you this is in a simulator. As it kept going I was watching the air speed and the speed was like going pretty slow like you could see it went Mach 1 then you were going Mach 2 then you were going Mach 3 and the speed was going up and we were probably like Mach 10. And then all of a sudden the speed just started going like exponential because it was like clicking down was like Mach 9 Mach hand Mach 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 and it just took off like once we got up to orbit and we started hitting orbit.
: [00:32:43] The speed just went crazy and it just started clicking by and like what felt like just seconds you were going another mark faster. And whenever that thing hit orbit I don’t remember what the Mach was but it was really fast. And it goes around the earth the shuttle at that orbit went around the Earth every hour and a half so every 45 minutes you had sunlight and then then another 45 minutes it was total darkness. It was mind blowing. It was the coolest thing ever.
: [00:33:10] And the reason I’m telling the story is to get the momentum piece.
: [00:33:15] This thing was moving although it was fast it wasn’t going really fast until the very end as you were just coming out of the orbit and then everything you went double the speed in just a couple seconds. And it was just fascinating to see the impact of what momentum looked like in that situation it was just fascinate. But anyway what a great story. As a pilot now that I flew helicopters after this experience and so like I had a checklist on my left leg and another checklist one was like from my personal notes and then one was like how to fly the aircraft for the astronauts. They had checklists on their arms both arms they had checklists like multiple checklists on each leg and then they had these rods that they would pull out of their flight suit like they would unzip a portion of their flight suit and they pull up this Raud and then the Raud would extend and then they were throwing switches because we did emergency procedures whenever I was in the simulator with them they would start throwing these circuit breakers in switches with these rods because they couldn’t reach the switches because they were so buttoned down inside of the cockpit. It was just so fascinating to watch them go through these emergency procedures. And one other thing that was really cool was on their checklist every page had Velcro because once they hit orbit what happens is is all the pages open up and they can’t keep track of what page they are on every single page and their checklist is Velcro. It was so cool it was the neatest them ever. Now that I’m done. We’re going to go back to the book. I apologize if I hurt people and got off topic here but now we’re going to go back to the book.
: [00:34:47] No that was a really cool press and especially for all of us who have no clue what’s going on in NASA but just know that doing a bunch of really cool stuff that’s how we’re able to describe. So thank you for sharing some of the details how the inner workings are so the things you might take away. Reading this book is his five step checklist of how to invite emotion or how to get momentum they feel like. So the first step is to make new choices based on goals and values. And then the second step as to putting those choices to work through a new positive behaviors. So you can almost see like how we’re going through the first chapter of the book The Three repeating those healthy actions long enough to establish new habits and them before building routines rhythms into the elite disciplines. And of course to round this off if step staying consistent oil long enough and of time and the best example I could come up with here was enough for me but it was actually based on my wife. Well now shamelessly brag about and I think she speaks six or seven languages. Like really really well and then she have some languages on the side and people’s immediate comment whenever they hear that or anything that comes up which is a lot more modest about than me by the way is typically something like oh wow you’re so lucky that you’re born with the right Tallinn’s to learn many languages.
: [00:36:20] Or something like that and see where people are getting that from because they might have learned you know a Second Language School phone or you know two years and then that’s it. And if I think about it but that’s not what she’s been doing so she’s been extremely consistent about forming habits and now she’s just to use one of the metaphors really gleaning into all bits here like what she does whenever she wakes up and what she does whenever she goes to bed is just to focus on learning languages. That’s what she does like preferably an hour sometimes shorter but she always does something even if it’s just learning two new words. She has this saying two cents in the piggy bank. It’s just all about forming those habits. Because one of the Parnes that hearties talks about here is that your mind works subconsciously and keeps on working even if you’re asleep. So if you start your day doing what’s important to my wife is learning a new language before she goes to work. If you do that you mind still works and if you do that just before you go to bed when you’re sleep you just soar. And apparently you just need to do that for three three years.
: [00:37:32] If anyone’s interested in that I can totally vouch for stick’s wife. She can speak six languages. You know you hear a lot of people say oh yeah they can speak six or five languages or whatever and usually it’s like they can maybe speak three really well and then the other two are like they can say hello and goodbye but with sticks wife this is 100 percent legit. My wife’s Korean and the first time we met Steg and his wife and it sticks Weiss from Denmark the first time we met Sophie she just like started talking to my wife and Korean and I was like only moly this is crazy. And another funny story we were in Korea Stig and myself and both of our wives and we were riding up an elevator in a department store.
: [00:38:14] And these two little Korean girls came in and they said something in Korean and and I just kind of looked at each other like I don’t know what they just said you know. And then Sophie out of nowhere says something back to them in Korean. And I looked at Sylvia I said What did you just say to those little girls. And she says Oh they said to each other that they wish that they could talk to me and then I responded back to them. And I said Yeah I can talk to you just talk to me and Korean. They both and whenever Sophie said this to them they both went oh they just couldn’t believe it. But yeah and as a side note stick’s wife also has a Ph.D. in economics.
: [00:38:50] So yeah. Hey whatever I can to shamelessly break and I just add. So I guess that’s the best way of running off Chapter 4. She’s way more impressive than both of us combined that’s for sure. By far by far.
: [00:39:05] All right. So sorry for all the stories we’re going way off on a tangent usually we’d like to think we’re fairly focused whenever we’re going through book reviews but today might be a little bit different. But I think it kind of relates to this last one where we’re talking about Stig’s Wife and it’s about influences and surrounding yourself with people that are going to take you to a higher level. And you know we had talked about this on a show one time it was with the real vision guys I believe and I didn’t know that this idea came from Jim Rowan. And for anybody who doesn’t know who Jim Rowan is unbelievable success author I highly recommend anything that he writes in fact Tony Robbins attributes most of his start and most of his success. Jim Rowan but anyway Jim Rhône evidently said you need to figure out who you spend most of your time with the top five people in your life that you spend the most time and understand the good attributes and the bad attributes of those people.
: [00:40:03] And more importantly before you identify who those five people are you need to think about who are five people that you really admire and why. OK. And then you need to marry those two lists up and you need to determine are these people that I spend most of my day with. Do they have the same characteristics of the five people that I admire. And if not why and whenever you can kind of come to that analysis and you think well why am I hanging out with this person who makes fun of me every time I’m with them and who encourages me to do these habits that are not good habits. Like why do I have that person in my life.
: [00:40:44] And what can I do to slowly start moving away from that person and attracting another person into my life that is going to take me to where I want to be and who I want to become and the way he explains this is he’s saying you should ask yourself who you friends really are or who you surround yourself with and then you should categorize them as either an engine or an anchor. So is it someone who is pushing you in the right direction or is that person holding you back. And then you have to make the hard choice of taking out quite a few people who is not good for you. Unfortunately he didn’t come up with any good formula of how you do that. I think that would be a very interesting thing but I think we can all find people in our lives that does not have proper influence on us. And sometimes we allow people to take us down that we shouldn’t. So if you talk to something l