TIP077: BILLIONAIRE OPRAH WINFREY – WHAT I KNOW FOR SURE

W/ PRESTON & STIG

12 March 2016

In this episode Preston and Stig discuss billionaire Oprah Winfrey’s book, What I Know for Sure. Back in 1998, she was giving an interview and one of the guests asked her a life changing question: “Oprah, what do you know for sure?”.  Although she didn’t know how to initially respond, the question was so profound that she continued to ponder her response for years after the interview.  After keeping a journal of “what she knew for sure”, Oprah compiled those ideas into this fascinating book.  Preston and Stig found it to be a very powerful compilation of life lessons that will make you reflect upon how you feel about your own life.

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IN THIS EPISODE, YOU’LL LEARN:

  • Why Oprah turned 40 before she learned how to say no, and why you should practice it now.
  • Why you shouldn’t enter any relationship with the intention to change that person.
  • Why what you fear the most always materialize if you let it cloud your mind.
  • Why you should embrace the truth of your past and let it set you free.
  • Why you should show true gratitude without expecting anything back in return.

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TRANSCRIPT

Disclaimer: The transcript that follows has been generated using artificial intelligence. We strive to be as accurate as possible, but minor errors and slightly off timestamps may be present due to platform differences.

Intro  00:06

Broadcasting from Bel Air, Maryland, this is The Investor’s Podcast. They’ll read the books and summarize the lessons. They’ll test the waters and tell you when it’s cold. They’ll give you actionable investing strategies. Your hosts, Preston Pysh and Stig Brodersen!

Preston Pysh  00:29

Hey, how’s everybody doing out there? This is Preston Pysh. I’m your host for The Investor’s Podcast. And as usual, I’m accompanied by my co-host Stig Brodersen out in Denmark.

We’ve got an interesting billionaire to talk about for this episode. And it’s not somebody that we’ve ever talked about on the show before, and that’s Oprah Winfrey. I know some people might be, “Really?” Oprah Winfrey is a billionaire. I’m seeing $2.9 billion is how high her net worth is. And she just has an amazing story and to be quite honest with you, I’m a huge fan, absolutely huge fan of Oprah Winfrey. I’ve been impacted by a lot of the books that she’s recommended through the years. And we’ll kind of get into that as we go through the episode.

But she wrote a book and so we’re reading her book. And the name of the book is “What I Know for Sure,” by Oprah Winfrey. Fantastic read. I’m just thoroughly impressed with her in general. So I’m not surprised that her book was so good and beneficial, but we’re going to go through that. And we’re going to talk about the different things that we learned in her book, and it should be a pretty fun episode.

You know, I think a lot of people in our audience are value investors and people that are probably more on the accounting side of the house. And you know, not every person that you study has to necessarily be this mathematical kind of figure out the intrinsic value of something to necessarily add value. And so that’s why we’re kind of stepping away from that for one episode. And we just want to dive into just looking at things from maybe a different perspective and kind of seeing how she kind of rose to the top and maybe some of the ideas that helped her rise to the top A lot of that is covered in this book. So it should be pretty good.

I wanted to talk a little bit about her as a person, and how she grew up and what kind of background she came from. And unless Stig has any opening comments that he wants to throw out there. Do you want me to roll right into that, Stig?

Stig Brodersen  02:16

Yeah, that sounds cool.

Preston Pysh  02:18

I just wanted to talk about how she came from nothing and created this multibillion-dollar empire. I think that that’s just so fascinating. One of the things that I don’t know if you’ve noticed this or not, but one of the things that Stig and I like to focus on our show, is we want to focus on billionaires that created everything from the ground up on their own. We don’t focus on the Walton children, for example. I mean, they’re billionaires, but their dad, Sam Walton, was the one that created all the value and them just kind of fell in on it. So we like to find self-made billionaires or people that have kind of created all the value themselves. And that’s whom we try to like the study.

So Oprah would definitely fit into that category. She was born in Mississippi. She was born to a single mother. Her mother was a maid and just came from not too much. And there was a part that I read that her grandmother used to make like dresses or something like that out of potato sacks for her when she was a kid. She was so poor. And so what’s amazing, as she went into broadcasting, and she started off as kind of this radio announcer and she talked about this a little bit in the book of just how much she loved doing that. And she talks about having, you know, a couple of different jobs like working in a store, like stocking the shelves, and like after the second day, she’s like, “This was just so miserable.” And then she had this opportunity to tour a radio station and the gentleman who was giving the tour offered her the ability to go up there and read something on the audio and she was just hooked.

She was hooked from that point forward and just quite an amazing story. She just talks about the feeling that she got when she was doing it and how much she just loved it. Well by 32 years old, she had her own talk show, and her kind of had progressed on to TV. But when she was 32 years old, she became a millionaire at that point, and then by age 41, just a decade later, she had a net worth of 340 million dollars, which is just incredible. By 2000, $800 million. And then she was negotiating her own deals, own the rights to the programs and all sorts of things.

Now, let me get the number here for you. 2008 I think there’s an interesting number. It says her yearly income had increased to $275 million a year, by 2008. So Oprah Winfrey was able to create an enormous amount of value by the way that she’s talking on the show and just the ideas that she presents.

04:42

Now, one of the interesting things about her is she talks about this experience, and some people might have heard this in the media before, but she talks about this experience where she was on the show, and there’s a little bit of this in the book, and she was there interviewing this woman and she brings out this man on the show. Just kind of like straight like the 1990s.

Oh, who’s the guidance? Stig probably won’t know, because he’s never watched some of these shows.

Stig Brodersen  05:07

Unfortunately.

Preston Pysh  05:08

She’s talking about how she had this woman on her talk show. And they brought out this gentleman who was the husband of this woman that she was talking to. It just turned into this big eruption. And just like, she was looking at this lady, and she could see that she just like totally destroyed her entire life right in front of everybody, in the whole nation. And she remembers that feeling and just feeling just so bad and horrible about it. She had vowed to herself, “I am never going to do this ever again in my life.” And it was this major changing point for her that she realized what kind of reach, I guess, that she had, and she has the opportunity to either create good for the world or create badly.

So that was a huge turning point for her and she kind of went on this excursion of trying to understand how can I do that with this enormous audience that I’ve been afforded? How can I do good instead of bad? And I just have so much admiration for a person that doesn’t look at that. It just shows you how empathetic she is. And it shows you how she’s kind of looking at things like, “Hey, I’m doing bad here.” Like she can feel it. She can sense it. She has a very strong intuition. She talks a little bit about that in the book as well. So that’s kind of the intro of how she got her start. And what’s great is the name of this book. So let’s just dive into how she structured this book and what it’s all about.

The book is structured in a manner that each little tidbit isn’t that long. It’s probably like two to three pages, each little thing that she’s saying that she knows for sure, but she has them arranged in a manner that kind of makes a lot of sense, and it’s only a few chapters. So I’m going to read what the categories are in the book. The first one is joy. The next one is resilience. The next one is connection, attitude, possibility, awe, clarity, and power.

05:57

So she has little things that that are like little stories that fit in each one of those categories throughout the book. And to be honest with you, after reading this book, it was just phenomenal. I absolutely loved this book. So I’m curious, Stig, did you like it as much as I am boasting about this book?

So the name of the book is “What I Know for Sure.” So how did she come about with that title? So at the start of the book, she says that she was interviewing a very famous film critic from the Chicago Tribune, and many people might know who this is, Gene Siskel. At the end of the interview, Oprah says “Everything was going perfectly smooth until the time came to wrap things up. Then he said something that I would never forget. He said, ‘Tell me, what do you know for sure?’ And he just kind of said it again. He says, ‘I’m asking like in life, what do you know for sure.’” And she was just so floored by the question just like, “Wow, did you ask a deeper, profound question?”

And so she didn’t have a good answer for him. She said what she did do after that question, it has made her think. And she was just like, that was such a profound question. She started writing down little tidbits. As she went through her life, she would write them down, like what she knew for sure. And so that’s what this book is all about is what does she know for sure about life.

Read More

Stig Brodersen  07:36

Yeah, I definitely liked it. I think I was surprised by that. Obviously, I know Oprah. I think everyone in the world knows Oprah. I haven’t ever seen a show with her. So I wasn’t sure what to expect. And also when I started the book, she said something like, she was narrating the book herself, which was inspiring too. She kept saying things like, “So as all women know. And since we’re all little girls,” like things like that. And I wasn’t sure what to expect. Well, she does that throughout the book and I’d say for all males to two read this book, if you have the chance you should definitely do so you will probably understand your spouse a lot better, after reading the book. But I thoroughly enjoyed the book. I didn’t feel like I was reading a book. I kind of felt like I was speaking to a friend like you get familiar or you get comfortable with Oprah right away. And I don’t know if that’s why people love her. Like you. You feel safe with her.

Preston Pysh  09:22

Yeah. And you know, it was awesome was the audiobook because I listened to the audiobook and I have the hardcopy, too, but it was just so awesome to hear her reading it because I mean… Come on. Her net worth is like $3 billion. She doesn’t have to read her own book. She could just hire somebody to do it. But I think because she got her starting her roots in you know, broadcasting. She probably jumped at the opportunity to read this and I’ll tell you what? She’s talented. When you listen to her read this, it’s amazing. It’s so good. It’s not a long read. It was pretty quick and just, I liked it.

Okay, so what I want to do is kind of talk about different parts of the book that I like because there’s so much stuff in here. That’s this just fantastic information that we’re just going to kind of hit some of the highlights. And some of the stuff I’m just going to read because there’s no way I can explain it as good as she did in the book because it’s very concise and to the point.

10:13

So the first thing that I am going to talk about was at the start of the book she talked about, and this is in the theory section, she talks about life being a dance. And I love this discussion because she’s saying, “You know what, as a human being, you can do anything you want. Like, you can choose to do something, you cannot choose to do it. And you know what, all of those choices are, okay. They’re your choices, and there’s no right or wrong to it.”

She’s like, “But at the end of the day, I look at life like this. It’s like one of the best songs that you’ve ever heard is playing right now. And she’s like, you can choose to either stand up and dance to that song, or you can choose to sit down in the corner of the room and watch everyone else dance to the song. That’s your choice. But I hope that if it is your choice, And it is yours, your favorite song that is playing, get up and dance.”

And I just loved the way that she… I probably didn’t explain it as well as she did in the book. But for me, it just kind of hit home just like, “Man. That is so true.” Like there are so many things around the world that are happening right now. And I think so many people are being forced into maybe a direction that they’re not necessarily consciously choosing. They’re just, you know, maybe they went to school for something that they didn’t necessarily want to get into. Maybe they went there because that’s where the money was at. And they kind of went in that direction. Next thing, you know, they’re just kind of working in the same job. They’re trying to progress because they see people in front of them progressing at a certain rate, and they just kind of find themselves in this rut that takes them down a road that they didn’t necessarily want to go down.

And I think that what she’s saying is that’s one thing that’s happening in the room right now, but there are so many other things that you could also do that I think people just don’t necessarily consider as a path or a thing to do. And she talks about this at the start of the book, and I just love the conversation. I love how she’s saying, “Hey, there’s all these things happening. And it’s your choice ultimately to choose whatever you want to do.”

Stig Brodersen  12:08

Yes. So Oprah brings this metaphor about life as a dance. And she says the same thing about communication. And she’s saying that it’s dance because one person takes one step forward and another person just one step back. But just like a dance, if there’s one misstep, they can both fall, and I just found this to be so much a beautiful way of looking at life.

And she said that whenever you’re communicating with another person, basically, if there is a problem one way or the other, you just take one step back and ask that person, “What can I do for you? What is it that you need?” And she said that one way or the other, you will always hear a response that is a variation of, “I want to know that you value me.” That was just so deeply said, really. Everything there is in life about relationships, that’s about people feeling valued. And this is not just business. This is marriage and friendships, work relations for that matter too. You need to feel valued to be able to function as a human being.

And she talks about a very strong experience of her own when she was cleaning a house and she found a 12-page love letter that she didn’t send. She didn’t send that but she wrote a 12-page love letter to a guy she was dating when she was 29. And she said that she had to burn. Literally, she had to burn that letter, because she read that and she didn’t want to have any written records of how pathetic she felt when she wrote that letter. It was a strong read. And she’s talking about how you should never ever enter a relationship where you don’t feel valued again. And I feel like I want to put in a quote by Charlie Munger and which just sounds like completely opposite. Now we’re talking about Charlie Munger and Oprah Winfrey, but he’s saying that “If you want to feel miserable forever, enter a marriage with the intention to change the other person.”

14:06

And this is where it all comes from personal relations. Like you can feel it deep down in your gut, “Should I be in a relationship with this person?” And if you feel it’s wrong, to begin with, it’s probably wrong. Like, I’m not going to change, Preston, when we’re doing this podcast. He’s not going to change me. So if he felt that we couldn’t work together, to begin with, or we could change each other, it would be the wrong way to start off a partnership. And I feel the same way with a spouse and Preston is nodding, he might feel a certain way about his wife.

Preston Pysh  14:38

This is just like a touch of the stuff that she’s talking about. And so if you’re not a real emotional person, or like, you can handle your emotions really well, this might be a great book for you to get out there and read because I’ll tell you, she’s gonna make you think about some different things in a different context for sure.

It’s funny that you got into the yes or no part because I remember just seeing something last night when I was going through my notes, prepping for the show. There’s this one little quote that she had in the book. She said, “If you have to make a decision between yes or no, and you have to ask for somebody else’s advice for whether it should be yes or no, you don’t know yourself what it should be. You need to take a step back and just wait and let time provide you the feeling that you should know whether it’s yes or no. And when you have that feeling in your body that it’s a yes or no, then you can make up your mind and  your decision.”

I liked that advice. That is some very sound advice, in my opinion. It’s not something that I’ve always implemented either.

15:34

Okay, so let’s go into another section that I wanted to talk about. And this one was in the, you could call it to chapter five, but she categorizes these stories as “possibility.” And in one section, she’s talking about fear and how fear can drive a person to do certain things. It’s a lower energy form. She says that basically, you know, provide kind of a bad path for you in life. So let me provide an example that’s not provided in the book but it kind of discusses this idea.

I’ve heard this idea as the Darth Vader syndrome, or the Darth Vader, or something or other. I’ve heard people say this before. But the idea is this: if you focus on your fears too much, you’ll materialize those and create those circumstances in your life.

16:23

So let me give you an example. And a lot of people might be able to empathize with this one. If you’ve ever been in a relationship, and maybe you’re this person, or maybe you’ve seen this person, where a person says, “Oh, they’re so worried about maybe their spouse is cheating on them or their spouse, you know, doing something that they just are worried about.” And so as a result, what a lot of the times they’ll do is they’ll say, “Hey, let me see your phone, or where were you at?” And they start asking all these questions and they’re showing that they don’t trust the other person. That’s effectively what it is.

When they’re saying those kinds of things or they’re thinking those kinds of things, it means they’re scared that the person is going to cheat on them or fall in love with somebody else, or whatever the case might be. And so that fear is driving their thoughts and their interaction with the person that they’re with. And so in the end, what they’re doing is they’re chasing that person further and further away from them because the other person is hearing, “You don’t trust me, you don’t love me or something.” And they’re hearing this, and it’s providing a lot of friction for them. And it causes the actual event that the person is fearing, which is, this person might be cheating on me. And in the end, that’s sometimes what they drive the other person to do, because of the way that they thought and the way that they kind of interact with them.

So this is just one example of a fear that a person has and you can see this with work too. So like, let me give you another example. Sometimes you have people at work and they’re so scared that they’re not going to get the promotion that they want, or that they’re not going to progress through the chain of the business, through the hierarchy of the business, that anytime they’re around the superior that they’re trying to impress, they go out of their way and they make the situation so awkward that they’re trying to progress. And you know what? The person who’s in charge and the leader in charge that maybe they’re trying to get their job in the future or whatever, they can see right through it, because they can see the intention, and we’re going to talk about that later.

But they can see the real intention of the person is that they’re trying to impress them, they’re trying to get the promotion. And it’s very off-putting. It comes from a low energy form, as Oprah would kind of put it. And so in the end, the person materializes their fear that they might not get the promotion and in the end, they don’t because somebody else who’s just a little bit more carefree who can be trusted, who’s not trying to be somebody that they’re not, ends up getting it.

18:47

I think when you take a step back and you think about it from your own personal experiences, what are you scared of? Or better yet, whenever your intentions and you’re acting in a way that might not necessarily be yourself. And you can sense that you can say, “You know, I’m acting right now, this is not how I feel. I wouldn’t be normally doing this if my intentions weren’t geared towards something.” And when you catch yourself doing that, the fundamental question you have to ask yourself is: what is it that I’m scared of? And why am I acting this way? And that’s what it’s an amazing discussion.

She talks about this a little bit throughout the book. And I just love the conversation, I think it is something that people need to be conscious of, because a lot of the times, they are acting that way. And they have no idea that the reason they’re acting that way or creating this situation, and they’re going to materialize it, is because they’re scared of something and they would probably never be able to tie that back to it. I think it’s a very important thing for people to do and to understand.

Stig Brodersen  19:43

I think the chapter I like was the one on joy. And Oprah talks about the importance of reflecting on what brings you joy in life. So this is again, you can probably hear this in her book and as Preston saying a very emotional book, but Oprah is almost provokingly asking you: what is that makes you happy? And how often have you asked yourself, what makes you happy?

She’s not talking about the feeling of gratification that you might have for after you know, eating a cookie that you shouldn’t be eating or whatever. It’s more like a deep thing like have you taken one step back to have this clarity about what makes you happy? And Oprah is talking about how you should make a commitment to yourself to investigate in yourself what creates real joy for you because the worst thing that Oprah I can think of it’s to live a life full of regrets.

20:39

And so I’ve been thinking a lot about this and I’ve been reading similar books in the past. So what I’ve decided to do because I’m such an organized person is horrible. I’m driving my spouse completely crazy. So for instance, today it’s Monday, but I know what I will be doing this Thursday at 10:15 am like, I have no everything in my life is put into at least one hour blocks, or sometimes even like 15 minutes or 30 minutes blocks. So I always know what’s going to happen, which is horrible.

What I also do, and this is based on one of the teachings from Oprah is I put in blocks in my week, not every week, but where I can reflect upon life. I know this sounds strange, I guess to some people, but I have something, for instance, tomorrow on my calendar, a block of time where I need to reflect upon what makes me happy, and respond to that. And the best way I can describe what Oprah is that she is deliberately intuitive. And the thing whatever you are going through a process like that of sitting down taking your time, perhaps in front of your computer or a piece of paper, writing down what makes you happy right now, that process will guide you, in terms of your personal life but also your work. And I just want to share that for people out there, if that’s the process they can use for myself. for me, it’s highly recommended for what it’s worth. Oprah’s doing this same thing. What about you, Preston?

Preston Pysh  22:09

So I’ll tell you this. Well, I know exactly when it was. When I came back from Afghanistan the first time because I spent a year in Afghanistan. I kind of went on this intellectual journey, if you will. And one of the people that I kind of latched on to immediately after returning and spending a year in, you know, in combat was Oprah Winfrey. And I kind of went to the source of what books have Oprah Winfrey recommended, or what has she said as some of her favorite books, and I’ve read those. And so what’s amazing is I can… because I went to those sources, whenever I read her work, and I can see how strongly she was influenced by some of these other writers.

So a lot of these things I don’t necessarily set aside the time as you’ve done, Stig, to think about, you know, what makes me happy, what I’m thankful for,  those kinds of things. I do dedicate a little a small piece of time every day to say what I’m thankful for to myself, but I don’t write it down. And that’s something that she talks about in her book is that she keeps a log of what she’s thankful for. And she fills that out every single day. I think this stuff is insanely important. And I think that it gets to the core or the axle of your life. And I think that if that’s not aligned, and it’s not straight, you’re gonna have a rocky road of progress as you kind of navigate your life.

And I think the faster you can get to how do things fundamentally work, from a spiritual sense from a just operating inside the environment, like the way you treat other people is how you’re going to be treated in return, all the reciprocity, all that kind of stuff is based and rooted on… At least for me, it is, it’s based and rooted in the ideas of what I’ve learned through Oprah Winfrey and the books that she recommended when I read those years ago.

23:56

So I want to jump to another spot here in the book and this time I’m not going to just kind of summarize it, I’m going to read what she wrote because when I heard this, I was listening to this in my car when I heard this, man, I got, like chills all down my body because it was just so profound. To me it was and I just was like, I am totally reading that when we do this on the show. So this comes out of the section called “awe.” And it’s a story about a gentleman that was on a plane crash, and what he said when Oprah was interviewing him, so here’s the story from the book, I’m gonna go ahead and read it for you.

24:32

“I’ve heard truly amazing stories over the years about almost every human situation, conflict, defeat, triumph, resilience, but I’ve rarely been more awed than I was by John Diaz’s story. In October 2000, John was on a Singapore Airlines Flight 0061 and it exploded at takeoff. 83 people perished in the flames. John and 95 others survive. Joh,  who described himself as a very straightforward competitive and pragmatic kind of guy, still endures physical pain from his injuries. But in other ways, he is more alive than he was before he literally went through the fire. The plane took off in typhoon like conditions. Before John, boarded his instincts told him not to get on the plane. He called the airline several times. Are you sure this plane is taking off? Because it was storming so badly. Peering out the window as the plane taxied. All he could see was rain. He was sitting in the very front of the plane and watch as the nose started to lift, but the 747 had turned down the wrong runway.

“At first he felt a small bump the plane hitting a concrete barrier, followed by a huge bump right next to them where something, a black hole, ripped the hole in the side of the plane right near where he was seated. His seat came on bolted in, he was thrown sideways. He could feel the motion of the plane rolling and spinning down the runway and then it stopped. In his own words, he said then the explosion hit a great fireball came right out over me all the way up the nose of the plane and it sucked straight back, almost like the movies. And then there was this spray of the jet fuel like napalm, whatever it hit, ignited like a torch and a gentleman, an Asian gentleman comes running right up to me fully in flame. I could see all his features and there was a look of wonder on his face. Like he didn’t even know he was dead and burning. And I figured, well, I must be the same. I thought at that point I was dead.

26:33

“So I asked John if he believed there was divine intervention that saved him. He said no. He said what helped him get out of his position in the plane was quick thinking to protect himself from the smoke and flames. He covered his head with a leather bag. He had been encouraged not to carry on the plane and then looked for the door and kept moving. And then he shared something I still think about to this day. The inside of the plane, John said, look like Dante’s Inferno with people strapped to their seat just burning, it seemed like an aura was leaving their bodies, some brighter than others. I thought the brightness and dimness of the auras where how one’s lives were lived.

“John says that the experience seeing what he could only describe as auras energy of light leaving the bodies and floating above the flames changed him made him a more empathetic person. And although he still won’t call his brush with death a miracle, he does say, ‘I want to live my life. So my aura, when it leaves is very bright. What I know for sure, is an awesome gift to be alive on this beautiful planet. And I want my time here to be as bright as it can be.’”

27:42

So that’s a little taste of like, just one little snapshot in her book and she usually ends at what I know for sure is this. And that story for me was like, man, I got shivers all down my body when I heard that the first time and I don’t know if it had that impact with you while you were listening to that, but for me when I hear that it’s just such an amazing story. And from that person’s experience, it changed his life. He looks at things completely differently now.

So I want to share that because it was just such an awesome story. Stig, did you have any comments? I’m curious what your thoughts are when you heard that one for the first time.

Stig Brodersen  28:13

I think it was a strong story. And there were a few times where you know, you almost shiver, I think you’re saying, Preston. You need to be in the mood for the book. And you need to be in a state of mind where you want to evaluate how you’re living your life right now and how you want to live for the future. And I think a lot of the near-death experience stories that you hear, I think they can change your life too, but you have to be ready for them. And I think when I read the book properly, and that’s probably because it had such a big impact on me, at this time is because I felt I was in that state of mind where I could receive strong, passionate, wise words from someone a lot smarter than me and with a lot more life experience than me. So you have to prepare yourself before you start reading a book.

Preston Pysh  29:01

So it’s funny that you said near-death experiences. So this was probably, I don’t know, it was a long time ago. But I kind of got into these near-death experience books, the one in particular that I think it was very beneficial. It’s a book called “Life after Life.” And it’s a gentleman, Dr. Moody, I forget his first name, maybe James Moody? He wrote this book that culminated and tracked something like 70 or 80 different near-death experiences that he had gone around and collected as a doctor. And then what he did is he wanted to basically… what was the common thread or the golden thread that was weaving between all of these stories because each of the stories was very different. And I know that for some people out there, they’d hear near-death experience and all that kind of stuff. And then they’re just like, “Oh, that’s a bunch of crap.” And it might be. I don’t know, I’ve never had one. So all I can do is listen to the story and see if there’s something valuable for me to take away from it.

29:57

So when I read this book, it was fast. anything because there were a lot of different experiences and like 70 or 80 different experiences. And then he talks about what the common thread was. And I’ll never forget that common thread in this book. And it to be honest with you, this book was like kind of a life-changing read for me, I’d categorize it as what probably one of my favorite reads. But in the book, he says that there are two things that people always came out of these near-death experiences with, the people that had deep and profound near-death experiences.

Number one was that they realized the importance of knowledge and how important it is to try to educate themselves. That was number one. The second thing was is they realize the power of love and how important it was to love other people. And this connectedness that occurs between each human being on Earth. Those were the two takeaways from reading that book, which whether you believe the experiences or not, I think that the common thread and that piece of information that was acquired from all that is so valuable, and so profound, and something that I often think about and try to think about as I’m going through life is what I learned from that book.

31:00

But anyway, we’re off the topic here I apologize. Stig said near-death experience, I’d want to throw out a book that I read like a decade ago. But okay, so the next thing I want to talk about is in chapter seven from “clarity,” and I’m going to read another thing here. And I know people have heard me talk about intentions and how important I think intentions are. You’re gonna see why I have those opinions after I read this from Oprah because Oprah and I have read some of the same books. So that’s probably where a lot of our same ideas come from. So I’m gonna read the section here, and it’s about intentions.

31:31

“I was 40 years old before I learned how to say no. In my early years of working in television, I was often overwhelmed by people’s view of me as a benevolent caregiver. Some people would spend their last time on a bus ticket to get to me, children would run away from home, abused woman would leave their husband and show up at the doorstep of my studio, all hoping I’d help. And those days I’d spent a lot of energy trying to get a girl back to her family or hanging on the phone with someone who was threatening to kill herself. I found myself writing check after check. And over time, that wore on my spirit.

“I was so busy trying to give all that everyone else needed me to offer that I lost touch with what I had a genuine desire to give. I’d been consumed by the disease to please. And often the word yes would be out of my mouth before I even knew it. I know exactly where the disease came from. Having a history of abuse also meant a history of not being able to set boundaries once your personal boundaries have been violated as a child, it’s difficult to regain the courage to stop people from stepping on you. You fear being rejected for who you are. So for years, I spent my life giving everything I could to almost anyone who asked. I was running myself ragged, trying to fulfill other people’s expectations of what I should do and who I should be.

32:50

“What cured me was understanding the principles of intention. To quote Gary Zukav, again from his book, “The Seat of the Soul,” ‘Every action, thought and feeling is motivated by an intention, and that intention is a cause that exists for one with an effect. If we participate in the cause, it is not possible for us to not participate in the effect. In this most profound way, we are held responsible for every action, thought, and feeling, which is the say for every intention.’

“I started to examine the intentions behind my saying yes when I meant no, I was saying yes, so people wouldn’t be angry with me. So they would think I was a nice person. My intention was to make people feel I was the one they could call on count on, last minute, no matter what. And that was exactly what my experiences reflected: a barrage of requests in every aspect of my life.

“Surely after I listened to the understand this, I got a call from somebody quite famous who wanted me to donate to his charity. He was asking for a lot of money and I told him, I had to think about it. What I thought about was, is this a cause I believe in? No. So I think that writing a check is going to make any difference whatsoever? No. So why should I do it? Because I don’t want this person to think I’m stingy. This was no longer a good enough reason for me.

“I wrote down a few words which I now keep on my desk. Never again, will I do anything for anyone that I do not feel directly from my heart. I will not attend a meeting, make a phone call, write a letter, sponsor, or participate in any activity in which every fiber of my being does not resound “Yes.” I will act with the intent to be true to myself. Before you say yes to anybody, ask yourself: what is my truest intention? It should come from your purest part of you, not from your head.

If you have to ask for advice, give yourself time to let a yes or no resound within you. When it’s right, your whole body feels it. I know for sure that I had to first get clear about who I was before I could beat the disease to please. When I accept that, I was a decent kind and giving person, whether I said yes or no. I no longer had anything to prove. I was once afraid of people saying, ‘Who does she think she is?’ Now I have the courage to stand and say, ‘This is who I am’”

35:12

I love that. I think it’s fantastic. She mentions probably my most favorite book of all time, which is “The Seat of the Soul,” Gary Zukav, definitely one of my favorite writers, and she references him in there. And that’s where she got that idea of this idea of intentions, being reciprocal, and being tied to actions.

Stig Brodersen  35:29

But Oprah said about adversity in general and being who you are and being okay about who you are. That’s one of the key takeaways that we can probably all learn from her book. And I think you talked about this also earlier, Preston, how, you know, Oprah had a very rough childhood, not only because so poor, she was abused as well. A lot of bad things happening. And apparently, it turns out that when she got famous, this story broke about some things that happened in her childhood and she definitely didn’t want the world to know that because she felt that it made her look weak. And she was afraid of how people would react to her, they will condemn her.

What she realized was that quite the opposite. Like whenever she was completely frank by all that happened, she got this feeling that the truth was setting her free. And it was a deliberation for her to experience how she could be herself with all of her past be completely authentic and be genuine and still be loved by all the people. And I think this is a question that we all have to ask ourselves at some point in time. Like, are we in an environment where we feel safe about being ourselves and not being guarded? And I don’t know this for sure, like Oprah Winfrey, but I definitely know from my personal experience that if you can be in a setting where you don’t have to guard yourself all the time, it’s a much better spiritual environment for you to be in.

37:01

And I think I personally experienced something like that whenever I started teaching, and whenever I started teaching, I was completely terrified of people pointing out that I was making mistakes. So like I’m making my own assignments. Since this is accounting and finance, there’s a lot of numbers involved. So this is also one of the courses where you can do the calculation and say, “You’re wrong Stig.” I mean, you can’t talk yourself out of it was this sadly for me sometimes the case and I just remember the first time that happened, I just feel horrible. And I tried to mask my mistakes and what happened was that I got bad feedback from my students because they could see right through that. And I created a learning environment where there was no transparency and no trust. How can I expect my students to learn in an environment like that where they don’t feel like they can make mistakes? Like that’s the wrong learning environment.

So I decided to do the complete opposite after a few months and even try to put in a short story whenever I have new students where I failed miserably. Like, I deliberately tell my students that I make mistakes, and when I’m making mistakes, just to make them feel comfortable. And what’s strange is that other people, not just students, but other people, they’re so forgiving, as long as you’re completely upfront about you’re not perfect. They don’t have to be perfect. You end up doing something great together, instead of guarding yourself and try to feel invincible because no one is.

Preston Pysh  38:43

So I love that story because it hits on something that we were talking about earlier with the fears and materializing the fear. So in a way, you were scared that you were going to make a mistake and that the students were gonna think, “Oh, this guy doesn’t know anything because he’s making these mistakes. And with the math right there on the board that I’m looking at.” And so because you had that fear, and they’re then seeing you potentially make the mistake, and then when they call you out on it, you’re acting defensively because your fears are materializing. And so you address that head-on. You said, “You know what, I am going to make a lot of mistakes.” You were forthright and honest and you probably sure on your course feedback. I’m very curious to hear the responses, but I’m sure your course feedback got so much better after you were, “Oh yeah, you know what, that is a mistake. I’m sorry about that.”

Is that what you saw?

Stig Brodersen  39:33

Yeah. 100%. Yeah. And you know, you might think that it’s counterintuitive, like, you can make mistake and a student thinks you great, or you can try to mask them and perhaps like fewer people would detect your mistakes and then they would give you better evaluations or you feel better about yourself, but it’s completely opposite.

Preston Pysh  39:51

Okay, so let’s go to the last chapter, which is titled “Power.” Then I have a small passage that I want to read out of this section, and they’re talking about your thoughts being… The power of your thoughts is what it’s talking about. So this is a quote from Maya Angelou, who was very good friends with Oprah. I didn’t realize that she and Maya Angelou were close. But Maya Angelou, a super famous poet. Recently she passed away. I want to say maybe a year or two ago, but this is what she had to say.

“Maya Angelou once passed on the following to me,” and this is Oprah speaking. “She said, ‘I’m convinced that the negative has power. And if you allow it to perch in your house, in your mind, in your life, it can take you over,’ she said. Those negative words climb into the woodwork into the furniture, and the next thing you know, they’re on your skin. A negative statement is a poison.” And that’s the end of the quote from the book.

40:49

I read that and I was like, wow, I love that statement because it’s just so true. And I treat it as like, “You know what, I’m just gonna assume that this is real. And then is a real thing.” And when you do that you start paying close attention to what am I thinking about? Where am I allowing my mind to drift? And more importantly, where is it going? And how long is it staying there? Because as it goes in there, and it associates with these other thoughts that are out there in the world, it’s pulling and drawing you closer and deeper into that area of influence. And that’s what Maya Angelou is getting with that quote: be conscious of your negative thoughts. If you’re always walking around saying, “Oh, that guy’s an idiot, oh, I don’t like her. She does all this wrong, or he does all that wrong.”

When your mind is consciously thinking in that direction all day long, you’re attracted to that thought process. You’re surrounding yourself with other people that think like that. In fact, you’re immersing yourself with other people that think like that all the time because like thoughts attract like thoughts. So like us, we’re like obsessed with like value investing, and all these billionaires investing in different ways. And so it’s no surprise that here’s Stig and I are reading all these different books and immersing ourselves in these people’s thoughts all day long and talking about it on the show and things like that.

42:12

So the point for all this is, what is it that you think about most? And how long do you stay there? And what kind of people is it drawing into your life that has similar thoughts and similar thought patterns? Are they people that you want to be drawn into your life? Or are they not? I think until people think about that, they might say, “Why is this person in my life? Why am I constantly dealing with this person who drives me crazy?” And I would tell you, you need to look at yourself first. Figure out what is it that you’re thinking about, what is it that you’re acting on with a specific intention tied to it, and maybe that’s why that person is in your life because a lot of the times, almost all the time it can always be drawn back to yourself and the way that you treat other people and the way that you think and allow your thoughts to go. I’m an enormous fan of this book.

Stig, you had one thing that you want to highlight?

Stig Brodersen  43:02

Yeah, I just have a final thing. And this is about the thing you said about intention. And this is all about gratitude as well. So I think that would be my final point. I think the whole idea about intention, gratitude, that was my, oh, I’ve said so many times. This was the main takeaway. I don’t think I can say it anymore. But there were so many great points from the book. But I loved the idea she had about her gratitude journal.

So Oprah was writing down five things every day that she was grateful for, and that would be something like going for a run, eating a cold melon, having a good laugh with a friend. And I think the profound thing for me was that the intention of her being grateful was so, so pure.

43:51

And let me tell you a personal story that shows why I am not as pure as Oprah apparently, for lack of better words. So I don’t know if people out there realize that we have changed the platform on our podcast to another platform which I was completely thrilled about because now I can do all sorts of things. So within the first week, I made our main site completely disappear which I wasn’t extremely proud of. And so what do I do in a situation like this? You know, I immediately call up Calin from MasterMind Group, and with desperation and panic in my voice, I tell him, “Help me.” I guess that was what I said, something like that.

And so Calin does what he does best, he just fixes everything. And he doesn’t expect to get anything. I mean, he’s just genuinely a nice guy. So I felt so bad about this. So what I decided to do was to, you know, he’s a good friend, so I couldn’t send him like flowers and chocolate. That would be all wrong, right? Yeah, well, apparently, I’m reading books that’s start with all the old girls know… So I probably could, but so I was sending him a gift basket with popcorn, beer, pizza, pretzels and so on. And I felt good about that, to begin with, because I felt like okay now you’re doing something nice for your friend that has helped you.

45:19

But what was strange was a few days later, I kind of feel bad about it. I felt like just adding context to that, Calin is a good friend like I’ve been on vacation with him and his girlfriend and he’s a close friend. It’s not just a business person I call up whenever I’m in trouble with. He’s a good friend of mine. So I kind of felt like, “Stig, why do you need a reason to do that? Why do you need Calin to help you out whenever you are completely ruined your own company before you show gratitude because then it’s not real gratitude?” And now we’re back to the thing about intention. What is it that you’re trying to do? Is it because you are grateful for a good friend? Or is it because you feel like she kind of needs to pay that person or you need to have your conscious clear? So I’m sure Calin will forgive me while he’s sitting and munching his beer and pretzels.

Preston Pysh  46:12

Very, very good story. I like that. And I like the fact that I sent Calin the roses and chocolates. Kidding. I’m pretty sure Calin would never take anyone of my calls ever again.

All right, so that’s all we have for you guys. The name of the book is “What I Know for Sure” by billionaire Oprah Winfrey. We thoroughly enjoyed this book. Again, Audibles, we’ve got a link on our website completely for free. If you want to listen to this book 100% for free, go to our website, use any of the links that we have in there for Audibles, and you get your first book for free. The ones after that you have to pay for it. But you could download this book and listen to Oprah read it to you herself if you go to Audible and you download it.

46:55

So one thing that I want to highlight. So Stig and I, believe it or not, we have people that say I wish you’d send me more email traffic. And I wish that you would tell me more about your blog posts and the stuff that you guys are doing more than once every two weeks. So, as I say that, I know there are people listening to this right now saying, “Oh, boy, here it comes, they’re gonna start sending email traffic every other day or something.” And we’re not, we are going to continue to send emails every two weeks with our executive summaries. We’re going to send an executive summary of this book, as well,  it’s about five pages long and the highlights, it captures all the key points of the book. completely for free. We send out this email twice a month.

But what I’m going to tell you is if you do want that information, and you do want to know when we post our newest blog article, I don’t want to clutter and Stig does not want to clutter your email with those emails because we know that you have that for work or whatever. So what we’re going to tell you is follow our Facebook page. It’s fairly new. We haven’t had a Facebook page up for too terribly long. We’ve told you guys in the past, we’re not real good at this stuff when it comes to social media and whatever. But if you go to Facebook and you type in, We Study Billionaires, you’re going to see it pop up as a page. If you like that, we are going to start getting into your Facebook feed. Like if we post a new blog article or whatever, which happens, I don’t know, like, once a week, twice a week or something like that. We have new blog articles. You’ll see those pop up in your Facebook feed.

So that’s where we kind of want to push people if you’re not following that site, We Study Billionaires, through Facebook, do that so that you can kind of get our blog posts and what we’re talking about like this week, I made a post about why Warren Buffett hates gold But why Ray Dalio, George Soros, and others are now buying gold and kind of tracking the cash flows, kind of flowing into that commodity. So that’s an example of a blog post that I just put up this week. If you didn’t see that or know about it, the best place to kind of be able to see those new posts that we’re making the blog post is to follow us on Facebook. So we’re just trying to push some people there that are wanting more common updates from us because we do not want to destroy your inbox. We don’t want to send out advertising or any of that kind of stuff.

Preston Pysh  49:05

So that’s I guess our pitch for going onto Facebook and following us. So that’s all we have for you guys this week. I hope you guys enjoyed the show. We thoroughly enjoyed this book. It’s a great book if you only have like small bursts of time in order to read it because the little short stories aren’t all that long. So if you’re a busy person, it might be a great read for you. And by the way, my wife loves this book. So you might want to get it for your spouse or after you’re done reading it, you can hand it off to your spouse. So that’s all we have for you guys, and we’ll see you guys next week.

Outro  49:34

Thanks for listening to The Investor’s Podcast. To listen to more shows or access to the tools discussed on the show, be sure to visit www.theinvestorspodcast.com. Submit your questions or request a guest’s appearance to The Investor’s Podcast by going to www.asktheinvestors.com. If your question is answered during the show, you will receive a free autographed copy of The Warren Buffett Accounting Book. This podcast is for entertainment purposes only. This material is copyrighted by the TIP Network and must have written approval before commercial application.

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